Category Archives: Personal

Dreams and Dreamers

I got an email minutes ago and I’m feeling spooked.

Why?

My friend Isabel lives across the globe. We haven’t been in touch for months. She doesn’t know anything about what’s been going on with me and my recent feelings of getting fed up with being single. From our past discussions she knows that I very much enjoy the single life.

We’re good friends but we’re not super close. I’ve never discussed my ideal guy/marriage/etc. with her. And yet, her dream describes the exact scenario I was wishing for.

Isabel, on the other side of the world, has dreamt of everything I’ve been wishing for.

I’m still a little shaken. I may be overreacting but I just find it really strange.

Here is the email in full:

I had a dream about you last night. You were getting married. You did not tell me and kept it secret. We were emailing each other about when we could get together. We both had various things happening over the space of a year. It was like we wanted to travel to meet up. You said we could after January but not at a midyear point because you were going to have a baby. I was shocked. You said you got married but were sorry you could not tell me. It was quiet. When I asked how it happened, you said your brother had arranged for you two meeting. Your husband was approved by your family or his family was approved but not someone that you knew. He was someone you did not really know. He might have been a little older than you. You texted for awhile and communicated with each other. You seemed well with him, like it was something you had not expected but that he was/is a GOOD MAN. I think he was quiet and not someone who likes to be in the front lines. He is steady and has a good heart. Not someone in your social circle. He was a man that was open to you traveling and your freedom was not restricted. He enjoys who you are. The marriage was a quiet one.It was not a public one. He likes things to be quiet and private. I think he might have worked with your brother or at a bank. This was in my dream.

What does it mean? I do not know? You seemed content with your new direction in life.

I know I was joyful for you.

Love,
Isabel

I can’t help but wish for her dream to come true. What wish are you hiding in your heart?

dream is a wish your heart makes Nadia Nader The Enchanted Rose Misty Hills Series Books Walt Disney

Musings

  • The 27 Week Project Update: Time to confess, I only went to the gym once since Monday. I haven’t been watching what I’m eating and so I’m dreading Monday’s weigh-in. I’ll have to hit the gym extra hard this weekend.
  • Writing Progress: I had an editing deadline yesterday and another next week. It’s been a little hectic trying to get everything on time because of personal issues. Several family members are in the hospital and it’s tough finding time to do things. I’m still thankful because it could have been much worse, I could have missed my deadline.
  • Travel: I’m excited about visiting Glasgow & Edinburgh. It’s coming up soon! I can’t wait to go on the walking tours I’ve scheduled. And I can already predict I will be spending a lot of time in bookstores!
  • Fall Projects: I want to be active this fall and go on walking tours of the city. I’ve been planning ahead of what I’d like to blog about. For example, I’d love to showcase the random art that surrounds us in Kuwait. I’ll post a separate post about that later.
  • TBR pile: I have 632 books. I’m wondering whether it’s worth sitting down and trimming it down. Maybe when I have a spare minute or two…
  • More Books:  I’m super excited that Robin Hobb has a new book coming out mid-August! FOOL’S QUEST! I can’t wait to get more Fitz!
  • Movies: At this rate I feel like I’m never going to have time to watch Ex-Machina. I also need to remember to watch Dope. I wonder if any good movies will be playing when I’m in the UK. Off to check…

Vacation Planning

I just bought my ticket to the UK for mid-August. I couldn’t decide which city to go to so I’ll be splitting my time by visiting both Glasgow and Edinburgh. If I like those two cities I may try to see more of Scotland in the future. I think those two will be fun to visit for now.

I’m still hotel-hunting. Prices are high due to the summer month (peak season) and the Fringe. I’m going to try to catch some of the Fringe Festival in Edinburgh. Hotels in the city are at around 75% occupancy.

Most of my friends are going to be in the South of France and Spain. I was tempted to join them but ultimately thought it was time to do something different and new. I’d like to visit the Baltic states in the near future. It’s time for me to wander off the beaten path and find a new path to travel on.

At the moment I’m pleased with my decision to go to Scotland. To prepare, I’ve put together a list of a few Scottish highlander romances to read 😉

Singledom

Reasons I’m single:

  • I’m picky
  • I’m insecure (about my body, among other things…maybe it’s time to go to a gym)
  • When I meet a guy I determine his friendship potential instead of relationship potential (maybe it’s time to change my outlook >.<)
  • I deflect compliments automatically (see #2) which makes the guy think I’m not into him
  • I make a lot of excuses for why that guy isn’t right
  • I automatically see the demise of the relationship and find reasons why it won’t work out
  • When a guy expresses interest in me, I laugh it off and discuss what a great friend he is or deflect

Now I have a list of habits to change.

Relationship Status: Single

It hit me yesterday, striking me out of the blue.

The desire to be in a relationship. The wish to have attended the event with someone by my side.

I’ve resisted it for a long time, because I prefer being single than being with the wrong person but yesterday I caught myself looking at couples wistfully. And it took me aback. Why? Because I was never that girl who wanted to be in a relationship. I always cherished my freedom. I loved it. I enjoyed it to the fullest. I preferred being by myself than wasting time with the wrong person. I saw how many of my friends and acquaintances had shackled themselves to the wrong person. And truth be told, I always felt a little smug that I hadn’t fallen into that trap and made the same mistake they had.

But yesterday was different.

I wanted to be part of an “us”. I wanted to show up with a special someone by my side. I wanted to laugh at jokes the host and hostess told and catch his eye sharing our own secret smile.

It caught me completely by surprise.

It looks like I’ll have to do something about it.